Better Off

I am writing this in the weeks leading up to the 2020 presidential election. I’ve noticed some recurring themes to our national conversations that only happen during presidential elections.

One of those themes is the question, “Are you better off now than you were 4 years ago?” Did you know that most people answer that question without considering anything but quantifiable factors like disposable income or net worth. 

But is “better off” really a numbers question? ...

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The Gift of Grief

I lost my best friend to cancer recently. My best friend also just happened to be a dog. But the dog-part is incidental; she was a loving friend in every way that also applies to humans, and a few others that don’t. We both felt the constant need to make each other’s lives just a bit better than they had been the day before. My friend constantly gifted me with lessons I could have never learned from a ...

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“OK, BOOMER”

The caustic and dismissive put-down of older adults with the phrase “OK, Boomer” is just another symptom of a bigger trend: a resistance to human interaction. To wit: people bristling at simple questions about spelling, pronunciations, names, places, and the like, with curt responses mostly limited to, “Just Google it”. This is often followed by detailed instructions about “how to” find answers online, and usually presented with varying degrees of irritation at the apparent ignorance in such matters. ...

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How (And Why) To Suck At Yoga

a big fan of yoga. My current fascination with it is only the latest of many exercise disciplines I have embraced over the years, some which I also still do. But yoga is a relatively recent addition to my list of regular activities.

Just one thing though: I really suck at it.

My abilities are so rough that I wouldn’t ever think of attending an actual “yoga class” — you know, like with other people — ...

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A Mild Case of Dead

Would it surprise you to hear that qualities like health, fitness, and even wealth are the booby prizes of life, and not worthy of your attention or effort in their pursuit? The fact is that we only pursue those relatively trivial qualities when we perceive life itself as a clinical matter—an absolute value—rather than an experience to be enjoyed.

Far too many of us believe that life is a logical construct, comprised of theories and data such as ...

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You Are A Life Coach

am a life coach. I only have one client, and I see him every day. That client is me. You are also a life coach, with at least one client.

Actually, that’s not true; we all have many clients. Except that we don’t call them clients; we call them friends. And, we never actually get around to sending them a bill. Why would we?

No matter how mysterious and magical we’ve come to believe life coaching ...

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The Importance Of Importance

In the ever-evolving practices for managing my life, I find that I have different priorities than most. I find that I have little interest in the common goal of becoming more efficient, or maximizing my productivity, or accommodating other people’s schedules, or any of the other priorities often labeled as good “time management”. I seem to be far more interested in what makes my life more enjoyable and interesting first, and as exclusively as possible.

In that process I’ve ...

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Is Life A Competition?

Sports and business are often used as metaphors for life. Are you among those that automatically assume that this is a constructive metaphor with some relevance your personal success in life? What about the possibility that the qualities necessary for success in sports and business is actually destructive to your quality of life?

This sports/business-life corollary is a constant theme in advertising and other forms of motivation. Personal development teachers all have their litany of sports/business metaphors that appear ...

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Everyone Knows How To Sing

There was a time in your life when you sang full-throated and loudly, with no self-consciousness or concern for whether you “knew how” or not. You may have only been 4 or 5, but it was still you. The only reason you now don’t sing, do it badly, or even think you can’t, is because someone in your past suggested to you that it was hard, rare, only for the talented, etc., and it caused you to think ...

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Formulas Don’t Produce Greatness

The above statement is why I believe that most—if not all—of the formula-for-success books currently raking in boatloads of money for their authors mostly miss the point of greatness. They write about formulas that were likely in place when greatness occurred, but those processes were never the cause of that greatness. Yet, to hear that a reproducible formula equates to reproducible greatness is just so logical that it sounds like it should be true, and we desperately want it ...

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